Smartasm

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean, I’d love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." - Mariah Carey

"I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don’t always agree with them." - George W. Bush

gbgirl:

Once in high school, when I spent most of my classes asleep or trying to not fall asleep (my natural sleep schedule was somewhere between 2AM-11+AM, and high school started at 6:55AM)-

I was sleeping in French, but luckily my teacher liked me (I’d been a good student the other year, and the rest of the class seemed to dislike him for no reason, though maybe because they were racist), so he kinda let me sleep. I had my ipod earbuds in, because I thought I was ~so clever~ to have figure out a way to hide them using my hair.

This song randomly shuffled on, but I didn’t notice, until the screaming started.

(This is a somewhat musical album, with spoken parts in a few parts. In this song, a murder takes place).

I woke up to screaming in the middle of French class, as the teacher lectured up front.

Anyways! I recommend this album, and most of this song. Just don’t listen to it while you’re sleeping.

vexypuff:

airikari replied to your post: bluh just came back from the dentist i have to…

I got all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed. I just remembered being knocked out and my dentist woke me up and told me it’s done. I think I was prescribed Vicodin and antibiotics but my mom hid the Vicodin…
@iTweetSexFacts: " Talking dirty " has been proven to stimulate the human mind during intercourse, improving the quality of sex.Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)

@iTweetSexFacts:

" Talking dirty " has been proven to stimulate the human mind during intercourse, improving the quality of sex.

Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)
@iTweetSexFacts: The vibrator was originally created to medicate women with mental diseases.Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)

@iTweetSexFacts:

The vibrator was originally created to medicate women with mental diseases.

Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)
@iTweetSexFacts: The vibrator was originally created to medicate women with mental diseases.Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)

@iTweetSexFacts:

The vibrator was originally created to medicate women with mental diseases.

Post from @iTweetSexFacts on Twitter (via Scope)
@freakingsarcasm: Oh Lord, give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW!Post from @freakingsarcasm on Twitter (via Scope)

@freakingsarcasm:

Oh Lord, give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW!

Post from @freakingsarcasm on Twitter (via Scope)
@GeorgeCarlinSez: Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey. ~George Carlin #p2 #Quotes #HumorPost from @GeorgeCarlinSez on Twitter (via Scope)

@GeorgeCarlinSez:

Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey. ~George Carlin #p2 #Quotes #Humor

Post from @GeorgeCarlinSez on Twitter (via Scope)
collegehumor:

16 Treadmill GIFs [Click to view entire gallery]

collegehumor:

16 Treadmill GIFs [Click to view entire gallery]